Could Your Teen Be Using Substances to Cope?
By Elisabeth Frazier, PhD
Adolescence is an exciting, yet challenging time filled with lots of changes, transitions, opportunities, and potential stressors. Sometimes, if teens are experiencing stressful life events and/or emotions that are difficult to handle, they may turn to coping with these feelings in unhealthy ways, such as self-harm and/or using substances.
Recognizing Substance Use in Teens
Teens may turn to substances such as alcohol, marijuana, and other drugs as an escape or a way to feel differently, among other reasons. As parents, it’s important to know some of the common warning signs that your teen may be engaging in substance use. There are also things you can do to support your teen in practicing healthier ways to manage tough emotions like depression, anxiety, loneliness, boredom, and anger.
So how can you tell if your teen may be using substances to cope? The following do not necessarily mean your teen may be engaging in substance use, but some things to look out for as potential warning signs of substance use in teens include:
Smelling substances on clothing or breath
Unusual changes in behavior - becoming more irritable, secretive, or isolative
Changes in eating and/or sleeping habits
Bloodshot eyes
Sudden changes in friend group
Changes in speech such as slurring words, speaking very fast, etc.
Supporting Your Teen With Substance Use
If you notice these or other behaviors that concern you, what can you do? While it may not always seem like it, what you say and do in front of your teen matters. Your opinions and actions related to using substances influence your teen. Setting clear expectations and consequences, monitoring behavior, and providing a non-judgmental space in which your teen can share their thoughts and feelings are key pieces of maintaining positive connection and supporting healthy coping strategies.
Aim for a parenting style that is warm, yet firm. Know your teen’s friends and their parents, as well as the activities they engage in when they leave the house. Encourage engagement in organized, monitored extracurricular activities to reduce opportunities to engage in substance use.
Practice What You Preach
You have a lot of influence on your teen, both directly by what you say and indirectly by the behavior that you model, so it’s important for you to practice what you preach and be clear with them about your expectations that you do not want them to use alcohol, marijuana, tobacco, and other drugs before substance use becomes a problem.
Manage your own feelings and listen with the intent to understand, not simply to respond. These are foundational tools for encouraging openness with your teen so you can better understand what is going on for them and how you can help. Avoid giving too much advice and focus on listening nonjudgmentally and validating your teen’s experience. If your teen asks about your own substance use or whether other family members have used substances, it is helpful to be honest but don’t feel like you need to go into great detail.
Lastly, strong parent-teen bonds and positive interactions lead to a sense of closeness and healthy attachment. This is linked to better outcomes and fewer high-risk behaviors in teens. Therefore, try and set aside one-on-one time with your teen to talk openly without judgment, and to engage in healthy pleasant activities that are of interest to your teen to build connection and positive time together. Be your teen’s biggest cheerleader and support them any way you can in creating positive change in their life.
DISCLAIMER:
The information, including but not limited to, text, graphics, images and other material contained on this website are for informational purposes only. No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.
If you or your child are in crisis or experiencing mental health problems please seek the advice of a licensed clinician or call 988 or Kids Link in Rhode Island.
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